Dear Cookies,

Dear Cookie, 

We need to talk. Our on again, off again, relationship needs to come to an end. Our midnight meetings and secret rendezvous were indulgent to say the least. I am an addict to your sweetness and it’s time to call it like it is. It’s OVER. I’m sorry I can’t tell you this in person. You are just to convincing with that face that melts at the sight of me. It’s hard enough to see you at parties, but I know this is for the best. I have given myself over to meats, veggies, fruits, nuts and seed and unfortunately that doesn’t include you.

Till I’m healthy,

Beth

I thought that my excitement to start my healthy journey would last a little longer then just a few days, but with being sick for the last 4 days, it brought me pity for myself that I didn’t expect so soon. I guess its good, since I was ready with my battle plan but I wanted a little longer of a honeymoon period.

I want to explain a little more about my “addition” to food. 

Friday night, I had a huge craving for cookies. I know, I know… they are just cookie… say no, right? Well, I wish I could tell you I don’t have a “problem” with food, but that would be a lie. I was thinking about all the ways to get my “fix”.

I knew I didn’t have any in the house. But I also knew that Jake was going to be gone in the morning. So… I started thinking about how to get the cookies.

Go to the store? Nope, too sick to walk and no car.

Make them? Well, I think I have all the ingredients.

What ones would I make, mmm those sugar press cookies are the best.

I’ll make those.

I took a nap dreaming about them. When I woke up, I emailed Em (even though it felt like I was ratting myself out). I told her I wanted cookies and I was already thinking about my plan on how to get them in the morning. She was so supportive and loving. She gave me some tips on how to beat the cravings with actions (ie sending the ingredients with Jake, drinking a big glass of water or tea instead, clean something). I knew she was right. I needed a plan. I was really too sick to even think I could make them and not over do it, but I made a plan anyways, I planned what I was going to have for breakfast. The first thing I did when I woke up was I made coconut curry soup and went back to bed. Once I was hungry I was ready to eat. It was perfect. I managed to not make cookies and stayed within my calories all day.

In fact, even though I have been sick, I have stayed within since the start!

Progress!! I’m in the groove.